Energy Healing For Grief: Support For The Bereaved
In our work as energy healers, at some point we’re going to be called upon to provide support for someone who is actively grieving. Energy healing can play a valuable role in supporting people when they’ve lost a loved one.
Grief is a normal human process, something we all go through. So the goal of using energy healing for grief shouldn’t be to “heal” it, since it’s a normal process.
Provide Comfort And Keep The Energy Moving
Energy healing for grief should lean more to providing comfort and a bit of respite, and to keeping the already-wavelike energy of grief moving. Because like all emotions, grief is meant to move through us, not get stuck in our energy field or our physical body.
Energy Healing for Grief: Support Spiritual Growth
Grieving provides a powerful opportunity for spiritual growth. We shouldn’t seek it out for this reason—all of us will have enough opportunities for mourning, without seeking it. But supporting a grieving person’s spiritual growth is another valid goal of energy work for the bereaved. Personally, I believe that deep grief prepares us for greater service to others. Having experienced profound loss, we can be more compassionate to others. Our hearts are softened, opened. We feel our connection to the rest of humanity. We open to the non-material world. We shed our masks and reassess our lives and what is truly important to us. We are prepared for new growth. Since grieving is something none of us can avoid, it is good to know that there can be spiritual gifts in it.
Provide A Safe Space For Feelings
Another important aspect of energy work for grief is to help people understand that grieving has its own timetable. In Western culture, we tend to think people should be all fine and dandy in a month or two, or even less. People need to be supported in not feeling weird because they're not done mourning in a time frame that is convenient and comfortable for others. Part of your work will be to provide a safe space for your client to acknowledge the reality of where they are emotionally.
Mourning has a very strong physical component, and so when you’re working with someone who is grieving, physical touch can be very helpful (if they’re open to it). Just holding someone’s head, with your fingertips gently at their occiput (base of the skull) can be extremely comforting. Holding your hands on either side of their heart (back and front) can also be very comforting, if they are comfortable with touch that's that intimate. If not, encourage them to hold their hand on their heart as they go to sleep at night and wake up in the morning.
Acupressure For The Bereaved
Working with accupressure points is also helpful, and has the added benefit of being hands-on. These acupressure points are particularly indicated for grief:
Grounding the person well is essential. The death of a loved one can be deeply unsettling. Grounding can be very steadying when we are feeling emotionally shaky.
Chakra Work For The Grieving
Chakra work can be extremely helpful. When a close loved one has been lost, the impact is so great that every chakra is affected. So balancing the chakra system as a whole is always indicated. In addition, I’d recommend:
Working with the 1st chakra, especially if the the loved one was a close family member. The loss can shake your client’s basic sense of security in the world, and sometimes even undermine their desire to continue living. This is true even if the bereaved person is an older adult who has lost a very elderly parent.
Working with the 2nd chakra can be helpful in supporting your client’s continued zest for and pleasure in life itself.
Working with the 3rd chakra is important if the loss has caused considerable worldly stress, such as when your client has lost a spouse and there are still young children in the home, or major financial changes in the offing.
Working with the 4th chakra is imperative, for obvious reasons.
Supporting the fifth chakra can be helpful, especially in the later stages of grief, as the bereaved person begins to recreate themselves, their life and their identity in the their new life and new landscape, without the loved one. Sometimes this can create powerful opportunities for new freedom, growth, and self-expression.
Supporting the sixth chakra can important in gaining perspective, insight and wisdom from the loved one’s passing.
Supporting the seventh chakra will help your client gain the most spiritually from their experience.
It will be up to you to decide which chakras are most important to work with during any given session. For home-care, the book Chakra Care, which I wrote to help people understand and work with their own chakras, gives lots and lots of ideas for ways to work with each of the seven chakras. You can use the ideas for yourself or suggest them to your clients.
Clearing The Field
Another way to use energy healing for grief support is to clear the field. Your goal would be to help move stuck emotions and trauma or other stuck energy. The passing of someone close can stir up many emotions from the past, and it's a good time for releasing them.
Teaching Your Client To Breathe In Light
Guiding your client in sitting quietly and breathe in light can also be helpful. Here’s a possible starting point for a meditation to guide them through. Elaborate as you see fit.
Imagine or feel that with each breath you are breathing in light. Imagine that as you breathe it in, your body fills with light, and then the light begins to fill your energy field as well, until you are surrounded with beautiful white light approximately a foot (or more) all around your body.
Finally, on a more practical level than using energy healing for grief, encouraging a grieving client to take good care of their physical body is important. Encourage them not to overwhelm themselves with new duties and responsibilities or to make huge changes their life if they don’t have to for at least a year. Encourage healthy food, regular exercise, regular sleep patterns, and getting out into nature frequently.
Another suggestion for home care might be meditation. Grief can be so overwhelming, it can feel like it’s all there is. Meditating can help a person gain some perspective, a little distance from their grieving. It can help them find some peace for their heart.
Another helpful home-care suggestion can be to create a little “altar” for the loved one. It can just be a shelf or really any horizontal surface. They can put things on it that remind them of the departed, pictures, things that s/he would like such as flowers, etc. The bereaved person can light a candle and just allow her- or himself to feel close to their loved one. In many spiritual or wisdom traditions, there is the idea that no one is ever really gone, that he or she only changes form. An altar can bring comfort by restoring a sense of this.
Wise Words From Spiritual Masters
The beloved Buddhist monk and teacher Thich Nhat Hanh has some beautiful and comforting things to say about dying, death and grieving. (for example, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S4LhQNsrI5A&feature=youtu.be) Buddhist teacher Pema Chodron also has much wisdom to share about dealing with life’s pain and tribulations. Stephen Levine’s life-work has been to work with dying, death, and grieving, and he too has much wisdom and comfort to share. I thought that this short passage was very good, too: http://www.spiritualityandpractice.com/books/excerpts.php?id=18145.
Perhaps one of these teachers, or others you find, will speak to the bereaved person's heart and bring her or him a measure of peace.
Let me close with this beautiful passage from Thich Nhat Hanh:
Suppose you are impressed with a particular cloud in the sky. When it is time for that cloud to become the rain you won't see that cloud anymore and you will cry. But if you know that the cloud has been transformed into the rain and the rain is calling you, "Darling, I am here, I'm here," if you have that kind of capacity of recognizing the continuation of that manifestation, you don't have to live in despair and grief. That is why for those who have lost someone who is close to him or to her I advise that they look deeply within and see that the one who was close is still there, somehow, and with the practice of deep looking they can recognize his or her presence very close to him or to her.
Of course, you can use any or all of these ideas about using energy healing for grief support with yourself as well as with your clients.
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